A friend recently asked me, “Do we as Christians have anything that will trump what the world has to offer?” Of course heaven versus hell is pretty good. Nonetheless, besides “fire insurance,” what are we, as followers of Christ, offering “pre-Christians” or “backslidden Christians?”

People ask, “What will bring my son, daughter, spouse, or other loved one back to the Lord?” I ask, “Why should they come back? And if they do come back what will make them stay?” Are we just looking to pull people away from drugs, sinful relationships, and bad habits? If so, there are great 12-step programs, rehabilitation centers, counselors, and psychologists out there. Or, are we longing for that someone we love to become a passionate, authentic follower of Jesus?

What brings the backslider back? What will be the turning point for that person you love to experience God and desire to follow Him? I don’t have any formulas to offer; however, as the director of a Master’s Commission program I have had the privilege to hang out with young adults who all have stories. Their stories have shaped my thoughts as to what brings people back, even those who have gone far away. Backsliding isn’t necessarily as extreme as the stories I am going to share, but it is encouraging to know that no matter how far away from God we get, His grace never runs short.

Lindsey Hansen is my intern this year. She knew the Lord as a child, but as a teenager experienced feelings of abandonment and rejection, rooting primarily from the day her biological father suddenly left. She tried to fill the resulting void with everything but God, including alcohol, and relationships.

Mandi Drinkwater is one of my first-year students. She also knew the Lord as a young child. Then because of a series of events, she, too, ended up feeling abandoned and rejected, which led to major depression and suicidal thoughts. Not wanting to trust in a God who would “allow” her to walk through all the junk she endured, Mandi turned to alcohol and a series of relationships to fill the void.

Zack Rupli, another first-year student, grew up in a pastor’s family. His parents, Tom and Nancy Rupli, pastor an Open Bible Church in Michigan. Zack recalls, “I knew I had a calling on my life, but I refused to be like my father and love his God.” He wanted the exact opposite of the life Dad modeled. At a young age Zack got into drugs, which led to violence and gang activity.

What was the turning point for these young adults? Lindsey woke up one morning dazed and confused after a long night of partying. After showering she wiped the fogged-up mirror and looked at herself for the first time in a long time. “I knew the things in the world would no longer satisfy me,” Lindsey said. “I was desperate for a Savior.” Her pastor, Jim Brewer, told her he still believed in her and that there was a calling on her life. He encouraged her to go to Master’s Commission in Spokane, Washington. Nathan Hagan, the director, loved her and walked with her through the junk from her past.

Mandi came to a point of desperation as well. “I was tired of things only feeling good for a moment. I needed something different that would last for a lifetime,” she said. Her youth pastors, Bart and Erin Bentley, told her she needed to stop running, but that they loved her no matter how far she ran. Their unconditional love for her didn’t make much sense to Mandi at the time. Then, in the summer of 2004 Mandi attended Frontline, an Open Bible national youth convention, and recommitted herself to the Lord.

An enraged Zack thought, “Why am I here and why can’t I stop this?” In desperation he drove to his church, got out of his car and started screaming at God. When he tried to think about his future all he saw was black. He couldn’t see past that moment and it scared him. He is sure he heard God, in an audible voice, tell him, “I love you.” The bleak future he had seen merged into clear details, marked by God’s fingerprints. A couple of months later, in a desperate attempt at a lifestyle change, he and his parents decided that Master’s Commission was the place for him. Zack often comments about the intense love of his parents and the prayers that saved his life.

As I listen to these and other stories and as I walk with students through the pain of their past, I see recurring patterns that led to the radical transformations: unconditional love from family and friends and a point of desperation, a defining moment leading to the decision to change directions.

The term “unconditional love” is thrown around a lot, especially in Christian circles. People rarely act out unconditional love. Few know what it means. Unconditional love means no conditions, no parameters, no laws, no restrictions. What if your loved ones never change?

Does 1 Corinthians 13 describe the love we have for the people around us? What if your time, energy, and money, brings no results? What if your loved one discovered the only reason you demonstrated love was to coerce them into joining your Christian “club?” to get them into heaven so you can put another point in your “box score” you turn in at the pearly gates for some recognition or trophy? I am not saying, by any means, that wanting our friends or loved ones to spend eternity in heaven is a bad thing; but is the motivator love or a sense of duty?

The second pattern is a point of desperation. Unlike Christians in other parts of the world, Americans are not desperate for God. The young adults I mentioned all came to a place where they knew they couldn’t do it on their own any longer. They knew there was something more – and they saw it in the lives of those people that genuinely loved them.

Finally, each made an intentional decision to turn around and run hard after God. We can preach all of the right sermons and say all of the right things, but when it comes down to it, our loved one has to take that first step back towards God. “Come near to God and He will come near to you” (James 4:8). God’s transforming power is usually contingent on us first taking a step towards Him.
So what are you offering your friend or loved one? Is the power of God evident in your life? Are you modeling the Christ-filled life you desire for them or do you look like another non-religious person, with the only significant difference being the label “Christian” you put on yourself? I ask again, “Why should they come back? Are we offering anything that trumps what the world offers? And, if they do come back, what will make them stay?” After all, their turning point is just the starting point to an unbelievable journey
with Christ.



Jonathan Lumbard is the Director for Des Moines Master’s Commission in
Des Moines, Iowa.